I've figured out every hour in every day, except tonight [completed]

Prompt: There wasn't really one. Just Amped bringing its drama.
Characters: Kiley Marshall, Phoebe Marshall, Chris Fraser, Harrison Blake, Tyler Wilcox, Eric Hayes, Tristan Emery (Amped)
Timeline: Start of Season 2.
Word count: 4, 162 (Total). This part, 2, 238.
Author’s comments: The second, and final part, of what I posted last night. I wasn't really going to do this much on it, I was daunted by the whole epic conversation re: backstory and didn't want to go into it (epically draining), but I pushed on anyway. Probably would have been wise to quit while I was ahead, but whatever.

---

The crowd was slowly dispersing, the effects of drunkenness floating up to her perch on the stairs. The night was in its final death throes and Kill shivered as the cool breeze wrapped around her. She couldn’t find the energy to care enough to go back inside though. It was that very same feeling that stopped her from turning around when she heard the door open behind her.
“I don’t want to talk Pheebs,” she muttered, assuming it was her sister, wanting to attempt another heart to heart. She’d been doing that an awful lot lately.
“That’s ok. I just need you to listen really.”
Kill stiffened at the voice and turned around to watch Tristan cross the small distance between them before settling next to her with a slight huff.
“We’ve never actually met.” he said, angling towards her.
“No we haven’t,” she replied, holding out her hand, “Kill.”
“Tristan,” he smiled, taking it, “I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“Same.”
“All scandalous lies, I promise.”
Kill couldn’t help but smile. “I wouldn’t be so quick to write it off, if I was you. Overall, it’s been good stuff.”
Tristan chuckled “Well, I do try.”
Kill looked out into the night, shifting uncomfortably under his gaze. After a few moments, he broke the silence.
“There’s nothing between us, you know. Not for a long time.”
Kill kept her gaze firmly ahead, barely daring to breathe. He sighed and continued.
“Sometimes I don’t think there was anything there at all and that I just wanted there to be. Saw what I wanted, you know? I’m not used to not being wanted.” He chuckled softly under his breath, and then turned to face her. She could feel his gaze burning into her cheek. “He wants you though.”
Kill snorted and met his gaze. “Please. He doesn’t know what he wants.”
“I think he does. He just doesn’t know how to admit it, even to himself.”
Kill sighed, dropping her eyes to her hands. In all the various situations she might have envisioned for herself, this definitely wasn’t one of them. Sitting on a deserted step in the middle of the night with Tristan Emery discussing the object of both of their affections. Hell, what were the odds. Still, something about the dancer made her feel completely at ease, completely open. He’d understand after all.
“Sometimes...” she began hesitantly, “Sometimes he looks at me like I’m the only thing keeping him sane. Then other times it’s like he can’t stand it, as if my just being there actually hurts him.”
“He looks right through me,” Tristan said softly.
Kill looked at him. “He does like you though, you know that right? I mean he always said he enjoyed hanging out with you –”
“Oh I know,” Tristan interrupted, waving his hand, “And I don’t blame him for any of it. It’s mostly my own doing. One of the things to understand about Eric is that he has a lot of skeletons in the closet, and that’s where he likes it. There’s so much more going on with him than I really understand and he just doesn’t like me enough to try to get over whatever it is that’s holding him back.”
“You aren’t alone there.”
“He hasn’t been the same since he’s been back,” he said shrewdly. When Kill didn’t reply, he continued. “He’s been way more self-destructive than usual. He missed the band, he missed you. He’s been beating himself up over it.”
“We aren’t the ones who left him. He wanted to come back.”
“I think he feels obligated to finish what he started here, but he hasn’t been happy.”
“He’s never happy.”
“He is when he talks about you lot.”
She sighed and looked up at him, searching his face. “What exactly do you want from me Tristan?” she finally asked.
He looked away, taking a deep breath as if weighing his answer.
“Give him a chance.” he said quietly, meeting her gaze again.
“What if he doesn’t want it?”
“He wants it.”
“I wish he’d just talk to me.”
“He’s a lot of work.”
Kill flashed him a small smile, before looking away again. “I wish he’d trust me.”
“He doesn’t know how.”
“That’s a bit presumptuous,” Kill replied, doubtfully.
“Hey, I’ve watched him. He hides away everything that means anything to him. It’s like pulling teeth trying to get anything personal out of him. I mean hell, did you know he had a sister?”
“Yeah.” Seeing his look, she explained almost apologetically. “I overheard him on the phone.”
“See? It’s all skeletons in closets with him. It’s like he doesn’t even trust himself, let alone anyone else.”
Kill thought about this for a few seconds before turning to Tristan again. “You know what Tristan, the rumours are true,” He looked at her confused. “You are more than a pretty face.”
Tristan laughed, squeezed her arm and got up. “I can see why he likes you.” He looked down at her, sobering slightly. “Don’t give up on him.”
She gave him a brief smile and after searching her face, he nodded once and headed back inside.
Kill allowed the stillness of the night to settle around her, barely registering the faint thrum of music and laughter that floated along on the breeze. She sighed and rested her head against the wall.
“I don’t think I could, even if I wanted to.” she murmured into the night, allowing it to secret away what she wouldn’t even admit to herself the last few months.

***

Eric was angry – angry for losing control of himself like that; for thinking she’d still want him; for wanting her to still want him. This was better after all. She was better off without him around to bring her down too. He was better off not having anyone who actually gave a fuck about him, which made it so much easier not to give a fuck about anyone else. He was so wound up he nearly threw a punch at Tyler when he came through the door.
“Whoa there man, I come in peace,” Tyler quipped, throwing up his hands and flicking his head trying to get his hair out of his eyes.
Eric merely glowered at him and continued to pace along the small confines of the room he had, well, fled into. Tyler watched him thoughtfully for a few moments before speaking.
“I saw Kill. She seems almost as upset as you.”
“Just leave me alone Tyler,” he forced out between clenched teeth, his fists clenching and unclenching on their own accord.
“Bad things happen when you’re on your own.”
Eric threw him a look that would have sent a lesser person ducking for cover. Tyler merely looked back at him serenely.
“You have to allow yourself to love Eric. It’s a key part of the human experience.”
Eric’s eyes flashed and Tyler actually took a step back. “You did not just fucking say that to me!” Eric was vaguely aware that he was shaking. He was also vaguely aware that he shouldn’t be getting into this with Tyler. It was Tyler for fuck’s sake. The haze that had settled over his mind made it hard to act on any of this though. All he could react on was the hurt, the humiliation and the anger, so much closer to the surface than it had been in years.
“What gives you the fucking right to stand around offering advice on the fucking human condition?” Eric hissed, taking a step closer to Tyler, “You don’t know a single fucking thing about me. You don’t know what it’s like to wake up and find the love of your fucking life dead! You don’t know what it’s like to watch your world fall to pieces around you just when you had finally dared to think it might actually be worth something! You don’t know what it’s like to lose your family, to lose everything! And to know it’s your own fucking fault! So don’t stand there telling me love is part of the fucking human condition! I KNOW what it is to love!”
Tyler stared back at him, his own eyes wide as he tried to process the words.
“Eric, I…” he paused and looked at him concerned, “What happened?”
Eric stared back at him, feeling utterly defeated. His lungs didn’t seem to want to take in any air, and his heart didn’t seem to want to keep pumping. He turned away from Tyler, running a hand across his face.
“His name was Anthony, and we were seventeen…”

***

Tyler sat next to Eric, not actually touching, but close enough so Eric knew he was there. He didn’t know how long they had been there, but it felt like the world had shifted in that time. Tyler always thought he was very in-tune to people’s emotions, and a lot of things about Eric made a hell of a lot more sense now.
“I destroy what I love,” Eric said quietly, his voice rough from emotion and the raging he’d done, “She’s better off without me.”
Tyler shook his head, shifting slightly on the hard floor. He wasn’t used to sitting still like this. “Don’t you think that’s up to her? You can’t decide something like that for her.”
“I…she…haven’t you listened to anything I’ve said?”
“Of course I have. It’s cause and effect. You’re mad because she makes you want to get better and you hate yourself for it. But you shouldn’t really. And you really shouldn’t write this off under the guise of it being for her own good. She deserves better than that. You owe it to yourself to do better than that.”
Eric merely shrugged. Tyler watched him carefully. Eric wanted this, but he had no fight left in him.
“It’s ok to love her. He’d be happy. He wouldn’t want you to be alone forever. He’d want someone to take care of you for him.”
Eric rested his head in his hands, and Tyler finally reached out and touched him, tentatively resting his hand on his shoulder.
“I don’t want to forget him” Eric mumbled, barely audible.
“You never will.”
Eric too a shaky breath, and lifted his head. “What is it with you, Tyler? Why do you know everyone’s secrets?”
“Poison” Tyler replied shrugging. Eric looked confused so he continued, “You know, you have to suck the poison from the wound? My dad always said people where the same and that sometimes they needed someone to draw it out for them.”
Eric blinked once before leaning his head back against the wall. “Not the weirdest thing you’ve ever said.”
Tyler shrugged and got up, figuring that if Eric could make quips, he was ready to have some time on his own.

***

Phoebe could not find her sister anywhere. She had been searching everywhere since Eric’s impromptu stage invasion, figuring that it would lead to all sorts of trouble. She was getting kind of worried, cause when Kill pulled a disappearing act it was hardly ever a good sign.
“Tyler!” she called, spotting him coming through the stage door, “Have you seen Kill?”
He nodded, and threw a thumb over his shoulder. “I was just talking to her outside.”
Phoebe moved towards the exit but Tyler grabbed her arm. “Uh I think she wants some time alone, Boss.”
“Tyler, I’m her sister.” she replied as if that explained everything, levelling him with a withering stare at the same time.
“But it’s about her and Eric, we’ve finally figured something out.”
“You know something, don’t you?” Phoebe asked, narrowing her eyes.
He smiled serenely back at her. She looked at him shrewdly for a moment.
“You sure she doesn’t need me?” she asked and when Tyler nodded his affirmation, she shrugged, “Okay, but I’m holding you responsible.”

***

Kill knocked on Eric’s door, her mind still reeling from what Tyler had told her. She shifted nervously from foot to foot, chewing on her thumb nail as she waited. After what felt like an eternity, Eric opened the door and she looked at him, really looked at him, taking in his gaunt frame, messy hair, drawn face and bloodshot eyes.
“Kill, I…” he began surprised, eyes searching his face. She simply stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him. His own immediately settled around her, words dying on his lips.
“You should have told me,” she murmured into his chest. He stiffened but she held on tightly. “I’m so sorry Eric. I’m so, so sorry.”
“So am I,” he replied, hugging her closer.
She was surprised to find she was crying. Eric pulled back to look down at her, cupping her cheek. She dragged in a breath like it was the last she’d ever have. He closed the door and pulled her over to his bed, wrapping his arms around her and holding her firm against him as she clung to him in turn. After a few moments, when her breathing returned to normal, she looked up at him, meeting his red-rimmed eyes. “Tell me about him?” she asked softly, hesitantly.
Eric kissed her hair and pulled her close again. She rested her head in the crook of his neck and settled in, listening to dawn as they helped each other chase the dark away.

Music: The Long Way Home - The Material
Mood: Geeky