Next to heartbeats

I ache. I ache and I am unhappy. Sigh.

Slept absolutely terribly last night due to the fact that every time I blinked, I could see someone lying next to me out of the corner of my eye. Of course there was no one there, but it felt extremely odd and slightly creepy. I could possibly have freaked myself out by wandering in the backyard around midnight looking for Oreo (it's very rocky, and kind of slopes up...so in other words, tiny hill in backyard) when there was this noise exactly like in Countrycide. That high pitched squeal/shout/bark sound. See, that episode still creeps me out.

I'm not going to uni tomorrow. Instead I shall try to get on top of this uni work, which is killing me. It doesn't matter if I can barely see straight, it has to be done damn it!

Oh [this is for you Abs] I came across another TW crossover Fall Out Boy song today, 'My heart is the worst kind of weapon.' Seriously. It's perfect.

I started writing something at work today, which I might post up as a flash. It just needs an intro. I also started brief paragraphs for two other things. I'm in one of those moods. And I want to draw. Which is always an odd mood when it takes me. Mostly because it's endlessly frustrating since I can't actually draw that well, and because I am a perfectionist, I can't stand anything I'm not good at and always give up. This is one of my worst attributes. I want to try and change that sometime, when I've got more free time or something, maybe take classes in things. I don't know. End of the year I'm definitely taking language classes though. French and German I think. But anyway, yes. I was talking about my writing mood. It sucks feeling like ideas are right beneath the surface, that all you have to do is reach out and take them, when you know you can't really. You're meant to be writing other things, focusing on other things, you don't have time for this fickle inspiration business right now.

It's not much fun.

Ah well, back to the figurative uni drawing board.

Music: Summer wind - Frank Sinatra
Mood: Have been better