It's time to run

Hello from my lunch break! I am eating fruit salad and listening to Muse, cause that's just how awesome I am. The Muse actually has nothing to do with my lunch break, I'm alone in the office (which will happen a lot apparently) and have been told I can turn up the radio as loud as I want cause "no one can hear anything" - terrifying as that is when put into the context of "no one can hear you scream", I've brought trusty Beckettoo along today for mood music. I couldn't find my iPod dock though, so I'm just blaring it through the headphones. It's surprisingly effective.

Aaaaanyway. The new job is going ok. I hate myself every morning when I roll out of bed at 6am though - it is an obscene time of the morning to be awake, alright? Obscene. I wasn't meant to do this. I can pretend I live in Europe however, since it's dark when I leave the house and dark when I return. Soon, the sun will merely be this mythical object I recall from my childhood. Oh the melodrama, see it, touch it, fear it (why won't you fear my wrath?) I think I'm on top of most of the things I'm supposed to do, I just need to be shown how to update the website, link photos, and create e-tickets. What fun. This job is just PR really. I don't know if I particularly like it, but I don't hate it - so I guess I'm ambivalent at the moment. A job, after all, is a job. I think most of them are annoying and loathsome in certain aspects.

For those absolutely hanging on to know if my sanity has survived another drive into the city - the answer is yes (I know it doesn't sound that way, but please remember that I've always been a bit...off). It was much better without the torrents of rain, and a firm decision where I was to park. I wasn't late for class either, always a plus. What a funny class too - funny odd I mean. The tutor seemed to misinterpret the vibe of one of the workshops a bit and things went a bit astray. I hadn't done any of the readings though, so I sat there playing catch-up as per usual. Next week I have to workshop. Abject WOE. I do not like my story at all. I'm attempting to re-write my NaNo novel, I just can't seem to get it right. Ah well, that's what workshopping's for I suppose.

Heard on the radio this morning that some random AFL dude called Jason Akermanis (look, I don't follow AFL, there are too many people on the field, I don't know what's going on) basically said gay players should stay in the closet because it would be better for the code. Quoth said the Raven:

"Football clubs are very different environments. Locker room nudity is an everyday part of our lives and unlike any other work place.

"I believe it would cause discomfort in that environment should someone declare himself gay."

"Young people from the ages 15-24 are the main participants in organised sport in Victoria. Some of them must be gay and I hope they thoroughly enjoy their sporting lives without having to experience any form of prejudice."

"But if they are thinking of telling the world, my advice would be forget it.”

The whole thing is over here.

This struck me as odd. I mean, okay, so he's saying he'd be uncomfortable in the locker rooms or with the physical contact if someone came out, but by his own admission, there must be gay team members. At the moment, he isn't uncomfortable because he doesn't know - but that's just denial. Whatever he fears is essentially already happening, he just doesn't know about it. I am not articulating what I am trying to say very well. Put it this way, if a team member he's known for years comes out now, it shouldn't change anything because they've done the whole locker room thing for years anyway. The discomfort ship has sailed, let it go! Blah. It just seems weird to me.

He is trying to be nice about it, I suppose. Overall though it just seems like a very negative thing to be saying, and not for completely convincing reasons. They're all things that could be changed really, if anyone could be bothered. It seems kind of contradictory to say there is too much of a bias in the sport to come out, and then just perpetuate that bias with that very advice. Besides, it's not about being a "gay rights activist" as he puts it, or making "the environment safer" - it's just about allowing people to live their lives. Why should gay players have to hold back who they are, and have this facade, to live their dreams? It's a ridiculous double standard - as ridiculous as the need to have this public outing anyway. Why should they have to announce their sexuality? Can't we just let people be?

We, as a society, spend far too much time worrying about what other people are doing.

Oh, and I love the comment about women sport not having a stigma - no, that's because when you're a female golfer, cricketer, rugby or soccer player, people tend to just assume you're gay anyway. Perhaps not inside the sport, but certainly from outside. Funny how the situation inverts. In fact, maybe none of this is even about sexuality as such, but rather about gender stereotypes...or is that the same thing?

I best get back to work - I'm so happy I don't have class tonight, I get to be home early - 6.30! Woo! Look what my life has become *headdesk* I still have two essays to write as well.

I think I'll bake pancakes when get home though. Hm yes. Pancakes, blanket, my grumpy dog, and Lie to Me. Good plan.

P.S: My computer mouse is driving me mad. It's one of those old school ones with the trackball underneath that I haven't had to use extensively in a very long time. I've forgotten how annoying it can be. Stop sticking, you stupid thing! Don't make me throw you through this window - I haven't been here long enough to justify property damage!

Music: The Resistance - Muse
Mood: Working