Friday, February 4, 2011

The Leto Corollary

This Leto thing is out of hand. Last night I had a dream that I was in a sushi place and he was a chef. I was waiting for food. That’s pretty much it. Problem being a) I don’t like sushi, b) I sincerely doubt that Jared Leto has been, or ever will be, a sushi chef. I blame the heat. In fact, I blame this entire unfortunate infatuation on the heat. I mean really, what am I, sixteen? I’ll not tolerate this madness!

I know I said yesterday that I may have been a bit harsh and that I should give him a second chance. I discussed it with relevant authorities, and they are sceptical as my initial opinion is considered valid (ie Abbi also thinks he’s a tool). I watched a youtube video. It annoyed me. I looked at his twitter account. It annoyed me. Then I saw this from Kerrang this morning. Really, Jared? Really? Sigh. (I’m sure he means well, but something about the way he means well just comes across so smug, didactic and insincere – encouraging eye-rolling rather than fuzzy feelings of good will. See also: vid for ‘A Beautiful Lie’)

There’s that saying about judging a man by the company he keeps, and I want to trust Mat Devine’s judgement here. But really, trusting Mat is a bit like trusting an ADD child in a Candy, Toys, Puppies and Fireworks store. So as far as a character reference goes, there’s still a bit left to be desired.

So, what is a girl to do? My mum, being ever pragmatic, always tells me to make a list. In this case, it may be necessary.

Pros:
Pretty.
Very pretty.
No, I mean really very pretty.
Walks around with his shirt off a lot.
Makes decent music videos. Kinda. (while ‘The Kill’ was so overplayed, it made me want to rip my eyes out and stuff them in my ears, ‘From Yesterday’ is still one of my favourites – even if it doesn’t make much sense.)

Cons:
Likes to hear himself talk. A lot.
Suspect walking around with shirt off is symptom of liking himself. A lot.
Suffers from delusions of grandeur and/or self-importance
Suggestions of huge ego issues (see above.)
His films aren’t that great. (I know someone is going to say Requiem for a Dream, but I haven’t seen it.)
His band’s not great either. (The singles have their moments but, as they are basically indistinguishable from the rest of the album, everything combines in a big mass of mediocrity.)
Apparent lack of sense of humour?

Hmm.

I am, all things considered, an intelligent human being. I pride myself on trying very hard not to be unthinkingly judgemental or superficial. Try. Yes. In this case, I suppose I am being both. But! I think I should stick with my convictions and not be swayed by the pretty. Regardless of the strength of that pretty. Evidence says, hes’s a bit of an idiot. And I will have to let logic prevail.

Phew. Aren’t we all glad that’s over?

PS: Jared, if you happen to google your way here – and you do seem like the type – listen to Mikey Way, don’t google yourself! Also, should you feel I have harshly misjudged you, please feel free to change my mind. Being no stranger to misjudgement, I am entirely open to revise my opinion given enough evidence. Dinner?

PPS: I’m not creepy, I promise. I know I sound it, but it’s the interent! It’s what it’s here for! Being an INFJ, I am actually constitutionally incapable of being a squeeing fangirl in real life.

PPPS: No hate mail, Leto lovers, please. Unless you are also a Cedric lover, in which case I have wronged you many times in the past as well and you are free to take me to task on that…mostly so I can laugh at you.

PPPPS: I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.

Music: Curse of the Curves - Cute Is What We Aim For (It is apt.)

4 comments:

  1. "Being no stranger to misjudgement, I am entirely open to revise my opinion given enough evidence. Dinner?"

    MADE. MY. DAY.

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  2. It's only fair to give the guy a chance to defend himself :D

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  3. In terms of the movie thing... I think it's a case that he just isn't big enough to carry a lead. His supporting roles in Fight Club and Lord Of War were both great. I still think he's a knob though...

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  4. I completely forgot he was in Fight Club! And I haven't seen Lord of War...Nic Cage avoidance initiate. Hmm actually, come to think of it, maybe I haven't seen enough of his films to really rule on that.

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